1) Be affectionate. Most girls love getting showered with affection and compliments from a guy they care about. Some girls can be insecure, and love getting reassured a lot. To be affectionate, just give her a gentle touch, put your arm around her, hold her hand, or do whatever you can do to give her a little bit of physical touch. This doesn’t mean you have to use everything you have on her, pick the right moments to let her know you care and it’ll mean a lot more than having your arm around her for four hours.
- Giving her a little kiss on the cheek or a squeeze of the hand is another way to be affectionate.
- If holding hands isn’t your thing, you can put your hand on the small of her back when you’re walking.
2) Be supportive. If you want to love your girl, then you have to support her as much as you can. Being supportive means anything from showing up to her soccer games to encouraging her to apply for a job even if she’s worried she won’t get an interview. You should be there to lift her up, not put her down, and let her know you think she’s amazing and capable of anything she puts her mind to. This doesn’t mean you have to follow her around and be her cheerleader at all times, she should support you too but it does mean that you should let her know that you will help her succeed in any way she wants.
- Sometimes, this may mean just supporting her when she is upset, sad, or confused. You have to be there for her during the good times and the bad.
3) Be a gentleman. You don’t have to transform your whole personality and start throwing your jacket over puddles to show the girl you love her. However, if you want to show her that you care, then yeah, you should probably stop belching and scratching yourself when you’re hanging out. Otherwise, she’ll feel like one of the guys, and you have to make an effort to make her feel different from your bros. Make sure to hold open doors for her, pull out her chair when you’re on a dinner date, let her walk in front of you when you walk into a place, and give her your jacket when she’s cold.
- Being a gentleman will make her feel like you’re paying special attention to her. If you want her to feel loved, then you’ve got to make that extra effort.
4) Be thoughtful. It can be hard for a lot of guys to know what it means to be thoughtful. Basically, it means that you should really put some thought and effort into how you treat your girl, based on what you think she will or will not like. So, take the time to really listen to her when she speaks, and to know what makes her tick. If it’s the morning before her dance recital, send her flowers. If she’s having a rough week, write her a love letter. If you’re at the movies, get up to get her her favorite snack. Take the time to get to know what will make her happy, and make the effort to give that to her.
- If you know she’s feeling low, acknowledge her moods and say, “I can imagine that you would feel…” while you shouldn’t say you know exactly how she feels, put in the effort to let her know you’ve thought about what’s going through her head.
- Pay attention. If she mentions a book she’d like to read or a new album she hasn’t heard yet, give them to her as a small gift. She might say, “I can’t believe you remembered that!” Now, that’s love.
5) Be understanding. If you want to love the girl, then you have to be understanding of the fact that she’s only human and has flaws, needs, and desires, just like everyone else. You can’t expect her to be perfect or to live up to some unreasonable expectations. If she makes a mistake, don’t spend weeks being resentful and being dismissive of her. If she flakes on you once, don’t sulk about it for days. Obviously, if she mistreats you constantly, then you should reevaluate your relationship, but if she has a few bad days here and there, don’t act like it’s the end of the world.
- Think about it: maybe she’s having a really hard time adjusting to a demanding new job. Maybe she’s suffering emotionally because her grandmother recently passed away. Try to see things from her perspective before you get angry or start a fight.
6) Know when to give her space. Part of loving a girl is knowing when you should back off a little bit. Maybe she’s had a bad week and really wants to be alone; respect that. Maybe she wants to have a night out with her girlfriends; tell her you hope she has a great time and don’t text her every five seconds to make sure she’s not flirting with some other guy. If you don’t smother her, she’ll feel your love more, and she’ll love the fact that you respect her individuality.
- However, it can be tricky. You have to recognize whether she really doesn’t need your support, or if she’s just saying that because she doesn’t want to be a burden. You have to figure this one out on a case by case basis.
7) Be romantic. If you want to love a girl, then you have to make some romantic gestures to let her know that you really care about her. Don’t do anything that feels forced or just completely unnatural to you, but make an effort to make your girl feel extra special. This can mean sending her flowers, buying her a box of chocolates, or doing something a bit more original that reflects on the nature of your relationship. Here are some other ways you can be romantic:
- Write her a sweet message in a card just because.
- Make her a delicious home cooked meal.
- Tell her you love her at the right moments.
- Write or recite her a poem.
- Take her dancing.
- Go on a moonlit walk.
- Have an impromptu picnic.
- Take her to a jazz concert.